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51Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:43 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Thank you!!! Smile Yes, it was hinted at in the prologue. Wink But, when I wrote that prologue, I didn't intend to bring Mari's mom in at ALL. XD I didn't know what I was doing at all! LOL! this story pretty much wrote itself. Smile
Thanks again, and I'm glad you like it!

52Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Aug 17, 2011 8:54 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Wow, REALLY? I mean, I would've figured a prologue like that was meant to be there for a bigger picture from the start, but wow, I'm impressed if you just tied things in like that just with a floating lightbulb over your head turning on out of the blue!Review Thread - Page 3 65586

53Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Aug 17, 2011 9:41 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

It's a gift. XD Haha, JUST KIDDING. I was winging the whole thing. XD NaNoWriMo is supposed to be a 50,000 word novel written in 30 days. I wrote it in 28, starting EXACTLY the night of November 1st, writing the Prologue with Marlinda and creating the character of Marilee Sunstar. Wink
Then everythign just fell into place later! I remember writing where they land/crash on Dantooine and meet Marlinda. I remember screaming adn jumping around in excitement that it was all tying together! LOL!!!! Thank you Grievous! yodagrin

54Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Thu Aug 18, 2011 6:38 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Ha, no problem, LOL, I'm still surprised/impressed at the whole thing.

55Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Thu Sep 01, 2011 8:35 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Well, based off of what you said at the bottom of the new chapter, it looks like things are going to be taking a very interesting turn! Can't wait, I also really want to see how Vader gets ivolved.

56Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Thu Sep 01, 2011 6:54 pm

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Haha thanks Grievous. Smile Yeah....things will get interesting soon. And don't worry, Vader's coming......I can't remember which chapter, but he DOES make his appearance...more than once if I am correct...XD
OH! And I was going to tell ya Grievous, I'm using your idea of the Jedi Enclave in the sequel to this story. Smile Mari and Luke Skywalker are going there. It'll be really interesting. I'm excited to write more of it! LOL! Wink

57Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Fri Sep 02, 2011 4:19 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Really? SWEET! Though if I may ask, PLEASE get the Enclave right, it's more or less dear to me, LOL, problably my fav SW locale throughout that entire galaxy of planets, battlefields, cities, etc.

58Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Fri Sep 02, 2011 7:50 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Haha!!!!! Yes.....I'll be doing deep research on it. PM me with all and any info you've got!!!!!!!!!!!! Very Happy I'm very open to info. xD

59Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sat Sep 03, 2011 8:22 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Alright then, whenever you need info, I'll be glad to give it.

60Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Mon Sep 12, 2011 9:31 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Great chapter, IDK why you're beating yourself up over it so much, LOL, true, it's a little boring, but you're adding suspense in it to make up for it so it comes out just as well.

61Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Mon Sep 12, 2011 8:56 pm

Jango Nova

Jango Nova

Chapter 7 is great! haven't had time to read 8 yet but soon lol


Btw im also Homeschooled lol Wink It seems we are in the same boat regarding school work as well

62Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Thu Sep 15, 2011 10:22 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Jango, I didn't know you were homeschooled!!!! That's so epic! Very Happy I am SOOOOOOO sick of school right now. XD 4 hours of Literature (Ancient Egyptian literature too...) will really kill it for ya. XD

Thank you so much both of you!!!! Very Happy

63Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Mon Sep 19, 2011 4:54 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Just read the new chapter, it had a few pluses, one the inevitable learning what happened on the day of Order 66 and their reaction to it was a high note, and the trining of Clay reminded me of Luke's training to a certain degree so that's a big plus right there.

64Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Mon Sep 19, 2011 5:18 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Aww thanks so much!!!! Smile I actually very much like this chapter, now thinking about it....Wink Yes, Clay's training reminded me of Luke's training as well!! Smile I really liked that scene. Very Happy
Thanks Grievous! I'm so glad that you've been reading and 'reviewing' for me. Smile It really means alot. Very Happy

65Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Mon Sep 19, 2011 5:37 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

No problem! It's always good to see the fan-fic section still running smoothly, for a while it was getting quite boring with no one, including myself, writing their stories. Speaking of which, I'm still rewriting chapter 1 of my fan-fic, but i"m almost done. I haven't quit quite yet, lol!

66Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Tue Sep 20, 2011 11:27 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

yodagrin Yes! I love fanfiction...so this section is great for me! I personally LOVE the way it is set up. Smile It's very organized, ya know? XD
Haha that's great!!! I hope that you get it finished soon, I wanna read it!!! Very Happy LOL!!

67Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Sep 21, 2011 6:40 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Wow really? Thanx, it used to be a LOT worse than it is now (every story was in one section and there was no place to review them except ON the threads), but I along with the other admins and mods here (thanx to you too guys!) got it all purtied up and looking like this! It took us a while, but it was worth it!

Thanks a bunch, it's a LOT longer than the orginal chapter 1, not to mention I made yet more editting on the prologue (I took out Captain Malluck, and just replaced him with a tactical droid to be Grievous's second in command) so i might as well repost that for new comers wanting to read the entire thing)

68Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Sep 21, 2011 8:05 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Haha no problem! Smile And yes I totally think so! Very Happy Hehe!!!

Cool!!! I can't wait for you to post the rewrite!!!! Smile That's so awesome!!!

69Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Wed Sep 21, 2011 8:08 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Thanks Jedi!

70Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sat Sep 24, 2011 8:13 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Ooo, read the new chapter! You gave us some more character development with maryanna (which is a good thing-always build up characters to keep things interesting), introduced some more minor characters (another good thing, a story needs its minor characters just as much as it's major characters), and had a GREAT ending for the story. Kinda creepy in retrospect! Like you said on the post itself, it did move a little fast, but it's not like it really damaged it or anything.

71Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sun Sep 25, 2011 5:50 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Thanks so much Grievous!!!!!!! Very Happy Well, it's not over yet, but it sorta ends the first 'part'. Everything else from here on out is more action packed. (of course, there will be slower chapters, but still). Smile
Thank you!! Yes, Maryanna is cool. XD She has more character development as time goes on, and in the sequel especially, you see her character in more depth. Wink
I hope you'll keep on reading!!!! Very Happy

72Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sun Sep 25, 2011 5:55 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Of course I'll keep reading! Not to mention, you're one of the only fan-fics beside mine, Jango's, and Ahsokasister's actually updating their stories anymore, so it helps keep the fan fic section still busy.

73Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sat Oct 08, 2011 5:49 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

Jedi, I'm just going to be blunt, give yourself a break. This was a great chapter, IDK why you acted so negatively about it. The desciption of Vader was great, I absolutely loved it, I've seen a lot of fan-fics try to shed some light on him immediately after ROTS, but this was by far the best. The fight scene was also written out well, it wasn't short nor dragged out too long. You also had a GREAT cliffhangar, and a bit of a surprise with Mari's arm getting cut off. Seriously, give yourself a break, and relax a little, LOL.Review Thread - Page 3 495192

74Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sat Oct 08, 2011 7:20 am

Jedi~Chick

Jedi~Chick

Haha, thanks SO MUCH Grievous!!!!!!! Very Happy You don't know how much your comment means to me. Wink
Yeahhh.....I really need to be more confident when it comes to my fanfics. Razz

Same here with the Vader thing! I always am afraid that I write him wimpy, but everyone who's read it says that it took him a while to be the feared sith lord he was in ANH. So I guess it's okay. Wink

Thank youuuuuuu!!!!!!!!! Very Happy Haha the cliffhanger is like, the best part. Wink Thanks, and I'll try and get the next chapter up soon, so you aren't left hanging for too long. Wink I thought that maybe cutting Mari's arm off was a bit too dramatic, or cheesy, but I think it works, and now looking back on it, I'm glad I decided to write that, because in the sequel it works more as well. Wink Thanks again, and okay, I'll relax a bit on my insecurities of my writing. LOL! Wink

75Review Thread - Page 3 Empty Re: Review Thread Sat Oct 08, 2011 9:02 am

GeneralGrievous505

GeneralGrievous505
Admin

No problem, I really liked this chapter, so I don't mind giving it a great review. I also don't see why you would think Vader wimpy in this chapter, he seemed very dark in my opinion! Especially when he cut Mari's arm off, another thing I belive I mentioned that I liked, it wasn't cheesy at all! Again, you have no reason to feel insecure about your story.

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