That Was Short: Kithaba's Tale

Part 1

Jabba's Palace
Bounty Hunter
Wookiee
Thermal Detonator
Carbonite
Han Solo
What is happening? Where am I? Why is it cold and slimy? What's grabbing me? Why does it feel like I'm on fire, yet being frozen to death at the same time? Why is it so dark? I must sort out the events leading up to this moment.
Jedi Knight
Rancor
Execution
Skiff
How did I get here, where ever "here" is?
Lightsaber
Sarlacc
Tongue
That's were I was: in the Sarlacc, being digested...

(To be continued)

Part 2

By now, my eye sight had adjusted to the darkness. I was some sort of "chamber" covered by tentacles, three of which were grabbing me tightly, very tightly. I tried to muscle my way free, but that did nothing except make these tentacles grab me even tighter.
"How do I get out of here" I asked myself.
"You don't". That voice sent a chill down my spine. It wasn't my own voice, no, yet somehow, it was coming from inside my head.
"Who are you," I asked, this time outloud, trying to hide the slight amount of fear I was feeling.
The voice laughed. As to what was so funny about that was beyond me. "Who am I or who was I".
"Just answer the dang question", I thought, hoping the voice wouldn't hear me.
The voice laughed; it apparently heard me. "You are just like Boba Fett over there, you think you are so tough, yet in the end, you are nothing more than Sarlacc food".
Boba Fett fell in here? How? It's not like I actually felt sorry for the man, he had done some pretty terrible things to people with bounties on their head, but it must have taken alot to knock a man credited as "the best bounty hunter in the galaxy" into the Sarlacc pit.
"Very well," said the voice,"I was Susejo of Choi, I am now the Sarlacc".
"And what on Tatooine is that supposed to mean" I asked.
The voice laughed again, clearly finding humor in the things I asked. "Before I fell in here, I was a boy named Susejo. Over the course of thousands of years, my mind and conscience were absorbed into the Sarlacc, enough to where I can control the beast myself. I am now the Sarlacc".
"So you're the once eating me"?
"Not entirely. The Sarlacc is the one eating you. I just control how slowly you get eaten".
"So you're not the Sarlacc"?
"Partially true. I am not the Sarlacc, yet I am the Sarlacc. It controls me, yet I control it".
What is he talking about? How can someone make the question "who are you" so complicated. I decided to ask him something else.
"Does it really take 1000 years to be digested", I asked, not actually wishing to hear the answer.
"Not always. Sometimes more". Another chill went down my spine. Susejo laughed even harder than he had before.
"Why must I be kept alive to be digested"?
"Whoever entertains me, entertains the Sarlacc. Who would entertain me if I killed everyone who fell down here immediately"?
"And why should I entertain the thing who is keeping me alive to torture me"?
Susejo laughed. "Because I will make you".
I looked at all the tentacles surronding me. I looked up and could not see the exit to the Sarlacc. It was probably just my imagination, but the three tentacles seemed to slowly be grabbing me tighter and tighter. Either way, there was clearly no escape from this torture.

(To be continued)

Part 3

"Jabba, this your last chance. Free us, or die".
The entire sail barge erupted with laughter. I had seen the Force in action; it could do some amazing things, but this young, slender Jedi Knight with a bad haircut was being ridiculous. How was he going to take on two skiffs and an entire sail barge unarmed? Although, to be on the safe side, I kept my guard up, just in case something happened.
"Put him in", Jabba shouted in Huttese. A Weequay guard, whose name I had never bothered to learn, moved the Jedi Knight in position on the plank.
I had never been a fan of the Jedi Knights, always sticking their noses in places they shouldn't, but I had to feel sorry for this Jedi. After all, he was only trying to do good by saving his friend, the smuggler Han Solo. Jabba was evil, I accepted that; he abducted me as a young child and turned me into his slave.
The Jedi jumped off the plank and into the Sarlacc pit.
"Poor Jedi", I thought.
Next thing I knew, the Jedi Knight came flipping through the air back onto the skiff, with an ignited Lightsaber in his hands. He immediately started chopping down the guards.
When the Jedi came to me, I chose not to attack. I hoped the young Jedi would acknowledge the fact that I did not wish him harm. However, he didn't. With a good kick in the face, I went flying off the skiff onto the sand below.
Fortunately, I did not land in the Sarlacc pit, rather a few feet outside of it. If I could just climb onto the skiff again, maybe I can help the Jedi and his friends...
I took the grappling hook I keep in my utility belt, threw it on the skiff above my head, and started to climb.
Next thing I know, a blaster shot from the sail barge shot the skiff's gyro systems, knocking the skiff off balance, and throwing me into the pit. With a frantic effort, I started moving my hands as fast as I could, trying to claw my way up, although this was not enough. The Sarlacc's cold, wet, strong tongue wrapped around my body and started pulling me towards its gaping maw. Screaming, I closed my eyes and hoped for a miracle...

***

I do not blame the Jedi Knight, nor do I blame the sail barge guard whose poorly aimed shot sent me tumbling into the pit, I blame Jabba. Jabba should have known he could not best a Jedi with the power of the Force. He was arrogant, he risked the life of his crew, as well as his own, to execute one Jedi who was doing no harm to begin with.

Now I sit at the bottom of this pit, being slowly digested, all because Jabba's head was in the clouds. I know who is to blame; all I need to do now is find a way to escape...

(To be continued)

Part 4

"Tell me a story," Susejo ordered.
"Why should I," I asked.
The pain was unbearible. An ear-piercing shriek rattled my brain and caused me to scream so loud I gagged.
Susejo laughed. "That is why".
While I did not want to tell him a story, I knew my head would explode if I heard that shriek again, but the Sarlacc would still keep me alive.
"Fine. Two men are out in the desert. They then come across a Krayt dragon. Feeling his territory is threatened, the Krayt dragon charges at the two men. One of the men begins to run, and the other turns and says to him 'you can't outrun a Krayt. We have to fight'. The running man then turns around and says 'I can't outrun a Krayt, but I can outrun you'...".
Susejo then laughs, obviously at the cruel nature of the joke. "That was short," said Susejo," but it was entertaining. That which entertains me entertains the Sarlacc".
The Tentacles' steel hold on me loosened ever so slightly.
"Tell me another story", Susejo ordered, as if one wasn't enough.
"I told you your dang bedtime story. Now leave me alone".
The ear piercing shriek nearly tore me apart this time, but I was able to ignore the pain; I had figured out how to escape.

(To be continued)

Part 5

"Tell me a story", ordered Susejo.
"Give me a good reason to", I shouted back.
One of the tentacles grabbing me let go of me, grabbed my right arm, and twisted it until it broke. The clean "snap" sent a chill down my spine and pain through my body.
"That is why. Tell me a story", Susejo demanded.
This was my moment to escape. "I'm not telling you another dang story you miserable, excuse for a sentient being. You sit down here asking everyone to tell you your stupid bedtime stories to your stupid pet Sarlacc. If I had a blaster pistol, I'd...".
The three tentacles let go of me, and swung so hard, they would have torn me to shreds, living shreds, had they hit. But they missed. I did a dive role forward, and used my momentum to launch myself out of the small chamber I was in and into the Sarlacc's main stomach. From the stomach, I could see the exit to the Sarlacc, and what a sight it was...
I ran at full speed to one of the walls, tumbling, flipping, punching, and kicking my way through the field of tentacles. As one of the slimy tentacles bent back to strike me, I rolled to the side, grabbed it, and used it as a catapult to launch me to the roof of the Sarlacc's stomach. I dug my claws into the beast's flesh, causing it to scream, and started climbing to the exit. I was completely out of reach of the tentacles, only mere feet away from the exit, I was free...
Next thing I know, a giant tentacle appears out of no where, grabs me, slams me on the floor, head first, so hard my skull cracked open, and my neck broke, with the signature "pop" of a snapping bone. The large tentacle let go of me, only to be replace by 4 more, each one wrapping around each of my limbs. They begin pulling in different directions, yanking all my limbs off. I was in so much pain, I was as close to death as a living being can get.
The large tentacle grabbed me again, and stuffed me down into the chamber I had originally came from. More tentacles grabbed and stuffed me into the lining of the Sarlacc's stomach, completely cacooning me.
The Sarlacc's stomach squeezed me so tight, I couldn't breath. Yet the Sarlacc kept me alive.
After the Sarlacc had calmed down, I could hear Susejo laughing. "You should have listened the first time. It is impossible to escape the Sarlacc".
As much as I hated to admit it, he was right...

(To be continued)

Part 6

Escape was impossible.
I would be trapped down here, with my limbs torn off, every remaining bone in my body shattered, unable to breath, and in incredible agony for the next 1000 years, possibly more.
What had I done to deserve this? I was a good person. I was abducted by Jabba when I was very young, like I had a choice then. The only reason I obeyed and didn't try to escape the disgusting Hutt was I didn't feel like being Rancor, or worse, Sarlacc food.
But now I was Sarlacc food. After all the precautions I took to avoid this, it ended up happening anyway, because of Jabba. Maybe if I was lucky, I would somehow be killed so I didn't have to endure this agony for much longer.
Next thing I knew, I heard Boba Fett screaming at Susejo. "...Instead, you spend the next 4,000 years playing philosophy, abusing the people you taught you to be what you are, never even dreaming that you had options, and why!?" I know what he's doing..."Because you're stupid, a miserable mean wretch of an excuse for a sentient being without the imagination or courage-". I then heard the "swish" sound as the tentacles snapped opened to strike, then the unmistakable whine of a jetpack. The bounty hunter was escaping...
The extreme heat and flames emitted from the jetpack mixed with the Sarlacc's stomach acid cause the Sarlacc to start exploding. Flames where everywhere, the sand was pouring down. Thermal detonators, concussion missles, grenades, flame throwers, laser blasters and every other type of weapon one can think of went flying everywhere. Sarlacc flesh turned to smoke as the beast began to melt. The groud began to shake and Sarlacc flesh began to rain down. The Sarlacc began to scream as it was being boiled alive.
Sand came raining down on top of me, the flames where coming towards me. I smiled; I would be killed, yet I would be freed from 1000 years of torture. A slow death by acid was traded with a quick death by fire. In the end, I had only spent one miserable day in here. In the end, I had got my wish.
In the end, as the flames engulfed me, I thought "That was short".

The End